When negative thoughts seep into our lives it alters our view of life in all areas. Do you see the beauty around you? Are you aware of the goodness in your life? Do you know that you can control what you see? This is a bit of a strange thought but let me explain a little bit.
Growth and Awareness Journey
This last year and a half has been a journey of growth and self awareness for me. I am not exactly sure when it began. It is funny that when we look back in time we can see how things build up but while we are in the moments we do not. Looking back I was in a spiral. I was in a gray, gloomy time of life but did not realize it. I enjoyed life but now realize I wasn’t FULLY enjoying life. My negative thoughts were altering my view. Things slowly began to weigh heavier on my mind. For example if my husband was late and I couldn’t reach him I imagined he was in an accident. I wondered when the phone rang if it would be the police. This was the theme that was growing more and more. Worry, anxiety and decreased joy.
Looking for work outside the home took me for a journey I didn’t expect! I am passionate about ADHD and helping women with ADHD or with ADHD kids. This led me to ADDCA where I took my coach training. During this process one of the courses was Personal Transformation. (The name says it all!). Through that course and receiving coaching I began to see how my outlook had shifted somewhere along the way. Somehow I was loosing site of the beauty in and around me.
REPLACING NEGATIVE THOUGHTS
I began working on my limiting beliefs, judgmental attitude, and perfectionism. Through this process the veil over my eyes began to lift. I began to feel more light and see more positives in my life. Driving home in the country, the skyline of our city, and the mountains as a backdrop I realized how much more beauty I saw around me. Now that the negative thoughts were being replaced with positivity and gratitude, I actually saw more beauty around me. This was not an easy process and does involve work but it is so worth it!
“When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” At the time I wouldn’t have believed it but through experience, I can say how true this is!
What do we do when we find ourselves sinking into a colorless world of negativity?
- MOST IMPORTANTLY: Please check with a health care professional to ensure proper diagnosis and care.
- HIRE A COACH: We are here to support and encourage you but also to point out when these negative thoughts and limiting beliefs are coming up. We help keep you accountable and on track in this journey. (I would love to join you on this journey as your coach)
- GRATITUDE JOURNAL: It is amazing how much thinking of the positives push the negatives back down. Buy a journal or small notebook. Every morning or evening before bed, write down 2-3 things you are grateful for. As your list grows read it over once in awhile.
- BREATHE: Not just the breathing to survive! Take time each day before or after your gratitude journal to do some deep breathing. There are lots of breathing exercises. Typically I picture a rectangle. I breathe in up the left side of the rectangle for 4-8 seconds, hold my breath for 8-10 across the top of the rectangle, slowly release my breath for 6-8 as I move down the right side of the triangle, and as I move across the bottom to the starting point I breath regularly for 8-10. Ok, so it is a funny looking rectangle! None the less it works for me!
- SELF APPRECIATION: Be patient with yourself. Be kind to yourself. Let go of guilt and shame. Learn from it and then let it go. Find things you like about yourself and tell them back to yourself. Smile and laugh more. Stand at a mirror and smile at yourself. The first time I did this I didn’t want to look at me smiling but that’s the whole point!
Life is too short to live in gloom. I laugh way more with my kids, I dance and sing crazy to get my daughter to smile (and shake her head), and I look for ways to embarrass my teenage son (which isn’t hard!). I have not always been this way. It has taken work and willingness to change. I still have my moments but they are fewer.
God did not intend for us to live in sadness or anxiety. Yes we will have trials. Yes life will get hard and dark sometimes. I am not saying we can not be sad or mourn. There is a time for everything. But HE doesn’t want us to say there. We can have inner joy even if outwardly life is hard. He can and will give you peace, even in the darkness. We have been given much and it is time we stop and recognize all we have.
“The JOY of the Lord is my strength” Nehemiah 8:10
“Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God” Philippians 4:6
“Giving thanks always for all things to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.” Ephesians 5:20
From my Family to yours,
Family AHD Coach Laureen